Boundaries are like bridges…
Boundaries: Two
They connect us more deeply, because they connect the real Us. You owe it to your self and to others to be the honest, genuine you.
How else will they know who you are?
Boundaries are also limits, but these are chosen by us. They are the lines that define the limit of one person and the beginning of another, and the lines drawn even within ourselves which we do not cross in terms of attitudes, beliefs and behaviour.
They define what we are comfortable with, and what we won’t tolerate. Boundaries are softer and belong to us in the sense that we place them where WE choose. They are transparent, flexible, moveable and based in self-respect and our personal values. They allow us to grow in a way that works for us.
If you never show who you really are to the person, all the people, you love, how can you live in a genuine, authentic way? How can you be truly happy if you’re hiding parts of you; because the things you hide - what you believe to be ‘bad’ - are only ugly in your eyes, not theirs. And the things you hide about yourself aren’t just the shadows; they’re the true beauty, the genius, the special-ness that your true self is. They go hand-in-hand because they were formed together and grew together, and then got hidden away together.
If you never show who you truly are, how can they know who you are? And love you the way you want to be loved? It is unfair to always feel you must project the person you think they want you to be. You’re assuming they don’t want to know the real you. You’re actually depriving them of the full beauty of you. And assuming they won’t still love you. Are you being fair to them?
So boundaries tell you, and the people him whom you interact, who you are. And they remind you who you are, and want to be.
If you’d like to try on some boundaries for size, take a look at this free worksbook that shows you how to create practical boundaries in ways that are not led by fears and pains, but with rational and clear thinking.
https://www.lettingthelight.in/store/p/starter-where-i-begin-workbook
If you never show your person, your people, who you are, you don’t get to show all your true inner self - the beauty and the beast. And they never get to love you in all your precious, individual and unique beauty.
Next: Boundaries for Mental Wealth